Skip to main content

Blaming Others Is Ceding Power To Them

 




Written by Fred Farai Nyakudanga


When you blame someone for your downfall, you're essentially surrendering your power to them. By doing so, you're implying that their actions alone led to your negative outcome. But are they prepared to solve your problems? Or are you admitting that you're powerless to solve them yourself?


Key Factors That Cause Blame


1. Lack of Discerning Trust: Before engaging in any partnership, trust must be established. However, trust shouldn't be given blindly. Verify the character and integrity of the other person before trusting them. Remember, people often talk more than they deliver.


2. Laziness: When you're unwilling to put in the effort required for growth, you may settle for less and blame others for your circumstances. A lack of personal initiative can lead to stagnation.


3. Failure to Acknowledge Personal Wrongdoing: Blame often stems from an inability to admit our own mistakes. When we convince ourselves that we're right despite unfavourable outcomes, we shift the blame to others.


4. Passivity: Inaction creates a power vacuum, allowing others to step in and dictate the course of events. By failing to take control of our lives, we invite others to make decisions on our behalf.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Resilience: The Key to Navigating Life's Challenges

  Written by Fred Farai Nyakudanga (FFF)   Life's no paradise – resources are scarce, competition's tough, and adversity's constant. But it's how we respond that defines us. Resilience is the ability to bounce back, to sweep away trouble and hold firm to gains. I once had a business in my 20s that did well in the short run, but when I sought support from a wealthy relative to expand, I was labelled lazy. I fought back, true to their word I became unpopular. Later, I realised people look at what you've achieved, not what you promise. I refocused, sought trusted support, and bounced back – refuting allegations of laziness. Each challenge's a battle; each win builds confidence. You don't start winning big battles, but small wins accumulate. Employers seek elasticity; vision falls on resilient people. As I was ridiculed and falsely accused, I gained favour with people in good time. Adversity may conquer, but bouncing back is resilience. Life's short. Elastic...

The Power of Family Influence

  Written by Fred Farai Nyakudanga The African proverb "charity begins at home" takes on a deeper meaning when we consider the profound impact of family on our lives. As I reflect on my own experiences, I realize that the values, beliefs, and behaviors we learn from our families shape us in ways that are both visible and invisible.   As a former restaurant manager, I noticed that people's behavior in public spaces was often a reflection of their home environment. Some patrons would leave the toilet spotless, while others would leave it in disarray. The effort we put into maintaining hygiene in our kitchens is often mirrored in our public behavior. This observation led me to realize that our family's influence extends far beyond our childhood years.   Our parents' behavior, expectations, and values are imprinted on us from a young age. We mimic their actions, adopt their beliefs, and internalize their criticisms. As we grow older, we begin to make choic...

It’s Not The End Of The World

  Written by Fred Farai Nyakudanga    This story is based on a true story and I have edited names so that someone is inspired out there. Resilience makes great changes in people's lives, don't commit Suicide     Fadzai sat on the edge of her bed, feeling empty and defeated. She had never felt so alone in her life. Thomas’s brief and dismissive response on the phone had left her reeling. She thought about her daughter, Rungano, who was now misbehaving at school, and how she was struggling to cope with the absence of her father.   Thomas had gone to South Africa for greener pastures leaving Fadzai with their only daughter behind. The plan was to relocate to South Africa as soon as Thomas had settled. In the first six months Thomas supported Fadzai with groceries, school fees and rentals. A shift began after Thomas had started seeing other women in South Africa. Thomas started sending money enough for rentals, school fees and a few groceries. The...